Being a submissive doesn’t always mean you need to obey your master and do everything to satisfy their desires and sexual needs. Although this is the main task a submissive should fulfill inside a BDSM relationship, if we look deeper, being a submissive holds more power and control than might appear. This is part of the BDSM game, so it shouldn’t be any other way.
Submissive partners get to experience a lot more challenges than dominants. This is because they are taken outside of their comfort zone. It empowers them sexually and makes them a lot more experienced than other partners. If you are a submissive, you have probably tried new things often and will keep trying some more. Things you were not comfortable with before might become your favorite BDSM fetish simply because you were challenged to give them a try. Nipple clamps don’t sound like your thing? Wait until your dominant makes you wear them and discover how much sexual excitement they could bring to the sexual encounter! So, your boundaries will be limitless and changing all the time. You will grow through every challenge and discover new aspects of your sexual identity.
A submissive holds power during the BDSM scene simply by using the safe word. If your dominant is pushing things to a level you are not comfortable with, all you must do is use the established safe word set before the scene started. If you are not ready for a dildo your dominant wants to use on you or if you gave it a try but you can’t take any more, use the safe word and the problem is solved!
During a BDSM scene they might not have much control over what is going on in detail, but the power of the safe word compensates for their lack of control. Also, even if it might not look like a submissive has plenty of control over their dominant’s orgasm just because you obey the orders, this doesn’t mean you have no insight or personal contribution to the BDSM scene. The way a submissive fulfills the tasks they are expected to do like the way they take the whipping and the spanking, the way they moan, the way they thank their master
for all the pleasure and pain they inflict in them, all these are their inputs in the BDSM scene. Sure, the dominant has control of the activities and performances, but the submissive partner holds the key to their dominant’s pleasure. They ultimately give the salt and pepper to any BDSM scene, transforming it from a basic scene of simply following orders to a successful sexual experience ending in intense orgasms for both.
However, it does take experience and time for a submissive to know how to react during a BDSM scene. This is also true for how and when to use they safe word, likewise, how they can increase the pleasure and intensity of a sexual encounter. It also takes a lot of practice to understand your submissive powers and to use it wisely because as a beginner, you might not even be aware of the influence you have. Submissive partners love to lose control, but they also get a lot of sexual satisfaction during the BDSM scenes. It requires a high level of flexibility and adaptability when it comes to new things and circumstances. These characteristics will be appreciated by the dominant and will know how to reward you for it!
