How to Date Your Kink in the Real World

Those into BDSM often want to go out together, but they feel they can’t continue the role playing experience in public. That is not true. It is possible to take your dom/sub relationship out into the real world. Some things would obviously be noticeable, but part of the fun in public BDSM is finding subtle ways to remain in the role play while interacting in a public environment.

Yes, some masters/slave use collaring and occasionally even leashes to indicate their relationship. But today I am going to discuss ideas that are a bit more subtle. Things that only the two of you completely understand that will keep your role playing active.

  • Adhere to roles. Does she call you Sir in the bedroom? Make her do so in public. You can set the guidelines as to whether this includes when in direct company with others or not, but the idea of continuing the roles in public often keeps that spark going.
  • Another good idea is to insist the sub continue to ask permission for small things. When she needs to leave the table or wants more to drink she will turn and ask his permission to do so. Sometimes this causes awkward glances from company, but it stimulates the idea of submission and dominance.
  • Keep a firm grasp on the sub when out and about. Some people choose to use the arm, others prefer the back of the neck. It is more subtle than a leash and collar and just as effective. She is still following your lead and your orders as she moves around a public venue.
  • Write on her body with washable body paint. It can be anything. One popular rendition is that she belongs to you. Make sure it is covered by clothing, but then remind her often that its there. Speak about what others might think if it was revealed.
  • Control the subs undergarment choices. Have her wear a short and sexy dress with no underwear. Make her wear something that lifts her breasts but leaves them bare. Choose what she is wearing and then speak of it often as you enjoy your time out.
  • Use vibrating panties or a remote controlled vibrator to tease the sub as she sits at dinner. No one around will know what is going on, but the consistent teasing will keep her attentive and behaving properly.
  • Use words often. When she speaks out of turn look in her direction and make a comment about an impending spanking. The part embarrassment and part arousal will be effective. Use opportunities to subtly mention things that will arouse her sexual desires.
  • Instruct her to do things that make her slightly uncomfortable. Tease with a person in public. Kneel before you and apologize for a transgression. Things that bring her submissive side into play and add an air of public knowledge.
  • Have her feed you or insist that you feed her from your plate. You may even go so far as to insist she drinks from your glass when you put it to her lips. You decide the drink and the food and she just obediently obliges.

BDSM isn’t reserved for the bedroom. You can incorporate bondage if you choose to go that in depth into the public role play. But for those that like to keep it subtle, simply use your imagination. There are no boundaries, other than legal of course, into what you can and cannot do as a couple regardless of your location.

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