Please tell us a little bit about yourself – How would you describe your everyday vanilla life?
My day to day is generally on the plus side. We all have our off days, but on the whole I find life is good. Every day is a celebration and every meal a banquet.
When did you first realize you were into bondage?
I think early into my 30s when I had matured and began a more introspective approach to fulfillment and to myself. I found the bondage to be a release and both physically and emotionally gratifying and exhilarating.
How you best describe yourself and why? Your choices are: Dominant, Submissive, Switch or Fuzzy Rainbow Unicorn.
Switch. I definitely enjoy both roles as each allows you to enjoy and explore both yourself and your partners needs and desires. For my partners and me, bondage is much more a release than a constraint and a combination of physical pleasure as well as emotional.
Do you feel that your desire for bondage is more physical or emotional? (please elaborate)
Definitely a combination of both. The basis of course is a trusted open consensual non-judgmental relationship. Without that basis I think you really are cast into a one-dimensional experience. Having the aforementioned relationship allows each of the participants the freedom to express and fulfill their physical an emotional needs and desires as well as helping their partner achieve the same. Thus I find bondage to be much more of a liberating or freeing instrument than anything constraining.
Were lovers accepting of your interest in bondage?
I found that in open trusted communication most were open to such activities. But I found it to be a very careful and cautious step for most because of fear of perception or judgment. But that I find to be true in almost all truly open communication. Most people have had their trust violated in some way and thus are very hesitant to open themselves again to that vulnerability. Thus for a truly liberating experience trust is essential
Please briefly describe your first bondage experience.
I had been with someone for some time and we had grown to be very comfortable together. She noticed that often times when we were having sex I constrained her movements by holding her arms above her or locking her legs apart with mine and so she asked about the controlling aspect which we then discussed and that then led to an initial exploration of bondage with various forms of restraints. And it grew from there using bondage as an instrument to support prolonged sessions where I could take hours to bring her to climax repeatedly.
What was your best bondage experience?
Well as the saying goes "what's good for the goose is good for the gander". My partner mentioned above also wanted the opportunity to control and so asked that I submit to her and so we had a prolonged session of tease and denial that was just amazing for both of us.
What is the most creative safeword you have ever used?
Kansas. My apologies to any resident of the state but it became kind of a joke to us because of the Wizard of Oz. The all-powerful Oz
What do you feel is most important about the experience of bondage?
I would say the liberation and expression of needs and desires and the fulfillment of those needs and desires in serving and being served by your partner
What is the best advice you would give to someone just starting out with BDSM?
Open honest non-judgmental acceptance and trust are critically important to developing a meaningful relationship open to exploring various interests
What is your favorite gear, toy or lingerie item from sub-shop.com and why?
We use a variety of vibrators and massagers to heighten and sustain arousal. We found the vibrator harness to be fun because it allows me to use my hands and mouth and body while she is simultaneously being stimulated by the vibrator.
What is the one sensual fantasy you haven’t lived out yet that you are excited to try?
Still thinking on that
What’s your favorite knock-knock joke?
Knock knock
Who's there?
Deja
Deja who?
Knock knock
What is Eskimo ice?
No idea
